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Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Mommy Guilt

Ladies, you all know what I am talking about when I utter these two nasty little words: “mommy guilt.” We all may have been prepared with the perfect nurseries, perfect birth plans, perfect diapers, and even perfect ideas of what we thought motherhood would be like. But we could never have prepared ourselves for the tremendous feelings of guilt that come along with the most important job on Earth. It begins almost as soon as we see the infamous two pink lines on the pregnancy test. We start to analyze each bite of food that we put into our mouths, making the right doctor appointments, getting the right baby gear. However, those guilty feelings of slipping a little extra chocolate as we pat our increasingly round bellies does not compare to the guilt after the babies arrive.

It doesn’t set in right away. In the early days, we are focused on the basics of newborn care and recovering from the birth. It starts to lurk as some start to plan for returning to work and leaving that most precious child with someone who doesn’t love them as much as we do. The thought is enough to rip your heart out. We didn’t expect it to be so difficult. Gulp. The guilt doesn’t go away after the baby stage either. In fact, it grows and gets worse. Why didn’t any of the countless parenting books and articles we read prepare us for it?! Then we have toddlers, which sometimes can be very trying to even the patience of Mother Theresa. We yell, and then wonder if we have warped them for life. We actually purposefully put them in front of the TV so that we can get through paying the bills and the house will stay moderately clean. Then we leave them there because we were so productive that we think we can just squeeze in a few more chores before breaking their zoned-out eye lock on the boob tube. Gasp. Just the thing we never, never, never thought we would ever do. We even used to judge those who did. And then we do it again the next week when we have to tackle the laundry. Horror of horrors.

Mommies, we must give ourselves a break. After all, maybe a gluttonous amount of TV now, will help them self regulate their own TV viewing later in life. Maybe that extra pregnancy chocolate helped us get enough calories to help grow those perfect, tiny fingernails. Perhaps there will be a recall on the more expensive car-seat with the better safety review and we will feel victorious for choosing the less pricey model. Did we love those sweet little people, though? Did we hug them and squeeze them? Yes! Today and every day. Isn’t that the most important thing anyway: that they feel loved? After all, helping our children feel loved deeply is the most perfect thing we can do. Even if we do it imperfectly from time to time along the way. Let us tenderly kiss them goodnight tonight and collectively, we will breathe a sigh of relief.

Originally published on ChesapeakeMommies.com
Monday, August 29, 2011

Menu Monday Corn and Avocado Salad with Lime Cilantro Dressing

Corn and Avocado Salad with Lime Cilantro Dressing

Ingredients:
One bag Birdseye White and Yellow corn, defrosted
Two ripe avocados
one cup grape/cherry tomatoes
one handful coarsely chopped cilantro
one small red onion
juice from two limes
1/4 cup olive oil
one small handful finely chopped cilantro
salt and pepper to taste

Cooking Instructions:
peel and cube avocados.
slice tomatoes in half.
dice red onion

combine all ingredients on the right side.

in a small bowl, combine lime juice, cilantro and salt and pepper. whisk in olive oil slowly.

top salad with dressing, mix well.



Serving Suggestions:
I serve it over fresh spinach or leafy greens.
Friday, August 26, 2011

Simple Two Week Meal Planning Method For Busy Moms

It's 6 p.m. and the end of yet another hectic day. You're stressed and rushing around the kitchen like a mad woman. You've got hungry kids underfoot, a barking dog, homework deadlines, soccer practice sooner rather than later, and on top of that... you have no worldly idea of what to prepare for dinner.

Sound familiar?

Although it's a common scenario in many  households around the dinner hour, it doesn't have to be for your family.

One option that I've found to be a no muss, no fuss way that simplifies getting dinner on the table
for my family (without the chaos) is to use the two week meal planning method.

The basic idea is to make a list of 10 to 14 of your families favorite main dishes (I usually plan 5 meals a week, leaving 2 days open for leftovers and/or take-out) to build your meals around, and then simply put them on a two week rotation, serving a different one every day.

That's it, it's that simple.

Now granted there's not a ton of variety here, but chances are you're probably regularly preparing a handful of tried-and-true winners anyway.

Think about it, your family is eating meals whether you take the time to plan for them or not, so then why not put some forethought into it, right? You will save time, money, and your sanity!

Here are a few tips to keep in mind when planning meals for your family:
Always keep staples on hand. A variety of frozen vegetables, pasta, peppers & onions, potatoes, rice, salad greens, etc.

Be flexible, nothing has to be written in stone. Work in a new recipe now and then, serve the meatballs on Tuesday instead of Thursday, if the zucchini is looking a little withered this week, buy the broccoli instead. You get the idea.

Determine what ingredients you will need before heading to the grocery store. After you have decided what recipes you want to make for the upcoming week, check your cupboards and fridge to see what you already have on hand. If you've got it, use it. Grab the remaining items from the grocery store.

Love your leftovers. Allow some space in your weekly schedule for "Leftover Night." Just heat them up and add a nice crispy green salad with crusty bread and let the family go to town! You practically get the night off and a chance to clean out the fridge.

When planning your weekly menus, be sure to keep your families schedule of weekly evening activities in mind. On nights when your family has many activities planned, go for something quick and easy like. Save the meatloaf for a lazy Sunday afternoon when time is on your side.

As you can see, meal planning doesn't have to be a complicated or time consuming ordeal, especially if you give the 2 week meal planning method a try.

Wouldn't it be such a relief to know that you don't have to worry about dinner every night? You will no longer dread dinner time, but in fact, you will actually look forward to it.

Bon Appetit!

Originally posted on FrederickMommies.com
Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Well-Balanced Moms Have More Fun!

Or should I say "Well Balanced Moms Are More Fun?" Let me ask you, When was the last time you had lunch with some girl friends, or went on a girl's night out? When was the last time you went on a romantic weekend getaway with your spouse? If you can't remember, we definitely have to talk.

It's so easy to fall into the mommy guilt trap. We feel guilty if we take time for ourselves, so we end up taking care of everyone in the family but us. It's easy to lose ourselves in the quest to become Super Mom. Along the way we get stressed out and aggravated. It's important to do something just for us to stay balanced moms. Here are some ways for you to get started on your journey to rediscover YOU.

1. Get together with some girlfriends. One of the best ways to rediscover yourself is to spend some time with your girlfriends each week. Have lunch together, go to the movies to watch the latest chick flick, or plan a girl's night out every once in a while.

2. If you are having a bad day, call one of your girlfriends to vent, or just chat. You'll be surprised how much better you feel and how it puts things back in perspective that seemed like the end of the world a few minutes ago.


3. Spend a romantic weekend with your spouse anywhere but at home. Go away for a romantic weekend with your spouse a few times a year. Rekindle your passion for each other and feel in love again, instead just partners in dealing with the everyday stuff involved in raising kids.


4. Go on a date every week. Get a sitter once a week and go on a date with your significant other. Spend some time reconnecting with each other. If you have an activity that you both enjoy, take a class together.


5. Pamper Yourself. Do something every week to pamper yourself. Go get a new haircut. Visit your favorite nail saloon for a manicure, pedicure or to get your nails done. Call your favorite day spa and schedule a facial. Get a massage.

If you are on a budget, pamper yourself at home. Send Dad and the kids to the park. Take a hot bubble bath and paint you toenails. Honey makes a quick facial. Place a cloth in warm water and apply to your face to open the pores. Smear on honey, and leave on for 15 to 30 minutes. Rinse off with warm water.

Don't feel guilty about taking time for yourself a few times a week. Your kids will appreciate it when they get a balanced and fun mom in return. You will be more relaxed, happier and actually be able to enjoy your family. After all, that's why you had kids in the first place, didn't you?

Originally posted on SaltLakeCityMommies
Monday, August 22, 2011

Menu Monday Vietnamese Stir Fried Chicken with Lemon Grass

Vietnamese Stir Fried Chicken with Lemon Grass

Ingredients:
1 Stick fresh or 2 tb dried slices lemon grass
2 lb Chicken pieces, cut into small pieces
1 Garlic clove, large
1/2 inch cube fresh ginger
1 tb Sugar
1 1/2 tb Tomato paste
1/2 ts Salt
1/4 ts Chilli powder
1/4 ts Ground turmuric

YOU ALSO NEED
2 Cloves garlic
3 tb Vegetable oil
1 tb Fish sauce OR salt to taste
4-8 tb chicken stock
3 1/2 oz Onions

Cooking Instructions:
First prepare the marinade. If you are using fresh lemon grass, cut it crossways into very thin slices, starting at the bulbous bottom end and going up around 6 inches. Discard the strawlike top. If you are using dried lemon grass, soak it in 4 tb of hot water for an hour. Put the chicken pieces in a bowl, add the fresh lemon grass or the drained soaked dried lemon grass (save the soaking liquid). Peel and crush the large garlic clove, peel the ginger and grate it finely. Add the garlic, ginger, sugar, tomato paste, salt, chilli powder and turmeric to the chicken. Mix, cover and set aside for 1-24 hours, refrigerating if necessary. Peel and finely chop the two garlic cloves. Put the oil in a wok or large, lidded frying pan and set over a high heat. When it is hot, put in the garlic. Stir and fry for 30 secs or until the garlic is golden. Add the chicken along with its marinade. Stir and fry for 5-6 mins or until the chicken browns a little. Add the fish sauce and either the lemon grass soaking liquid or 4 tb stock. Stir once and cover. Cook on high heat for 5 mins. Lift the lid and stir, adding another 4 tb of stock. Cover, turn the heat to low and cook for another 5 mins. While the chicken cooks, peel the onions and cut them into a 3/4 inch dice. Separate the onion layers within the diced pieces. Turn the heat under the chicken to high, remove the wok lid, add the onion and fry for 1 minute. Lift the chicken out of oil and serve.

Submitted to The Mommies Network recipe database by a member.
Friday, August 19, 2011

Reducing the Risk of PPD and Other Postpartum Emotional Issues


Planning, hoping wishing and dreaming and now the big event finally happened… I just had a baby! So why am I not thrilled? Sadness after pregnancy may come as a surprise to many people who expect to be glowing with joy and bursting with pride, but it doesn’t always feel that way. For one thing, you've got a flood of hormones running through your body. You're also physically exhausted, maybe in pain from birth, and now you have a new responsibility that is wonderful, yes, but still a lot of work!
Mother and Newborn Baby Boy
Photo Credit: Jon Ovington
But don’t worry; it is normal to be a little overwhelmed, scared, sad, or confused.
According to The National Institutes of Mental Health, studies show that the childbearing years are when a woman is most likely to experience depression in her lifetime. Approximately 15% of all women will experience postpartum depression following the birth of a child. 
So What can you do?
  • Continue to take your prentatal vitamins! Some symptoms are caused by imbalances that can be helped by vitamins.
  • Eat Healthy- A healthy diet can also help to balance your body's chemistry. It is also vital to take in enough calories when nursing so your baby gets enough nutrition and you don't suffer physically. Talk to your doctor about setting up a diet plan. TOO HARD? Try these simple guidelines: eat a good balance of all the important nutrients! Include dairy, bananas, soy based, folates (leafy greens), and turkey (good source of tryptophan to help your body's production of serotonin). Also citrus foods for vitamin C!
  • Support groups can be very helpful. Often talking to other moms who are experiencing similar feelings can not only show you that YOU ARE NOT ALONE but also give you some SUGGESTIONS on what worked for them- different ideas on how to get PAST your sadness .
  • Be sure to have some Daddy time! Allow daddy to spend time with the baby so you can take a nap, take a hot bath, go to a cafe , or go for a walk. Don't feel like this is taking away from your bonding time. Being with baby is important, but so is feeling happy about yourself. It is also good for dad and baby to bond. Even if it's just 10 minutes in hot shower or sipping tea while you read a magazine. You are a mommy, but you are also still YOU and will always be you. A woman, a person, an individual.
Teen Depression, The Illusion of the Beauty Queen
Photo credit: Tollie Schmidt
Remember that sadness after the birth of a baby is normal but it also affects everyone in your household, from your spouse, to your baby, and even other children if you have any. It is important for you to be proactive in dealing with this sadness.

Every day you need to:
GET OUT OF BED
TAKE A SHOWER
GET DRESSED
HAVE SOMETHING TO EAT
And DO SOMETHING FUN! (Even if you don't want to!)
Go write that down on a notepad now and stick it somewhere where you can see it every day. 

These activities will not only reduce the period of sadness, they will help to prevent a more serious form of depression from occurring.
Parenting may not be all sunshine and rainbows, but enjoying the miracle of your baby, taking care of yourself, and realizing that you’re not alone will help you immensely throughout the journey.
Happy Mom
Photo Credit: Tara Hunt


Submitted by Jill PhD, MSpsy, MPA, CHt.  Jill is a Member of NorthMetroDCMommies.  Originally published on the NorthMetroDCMommies Blog.
Wednesday, August 17, 2011

I Understand Why...

I now understand why, when I was young and got sick, my mom would go get my medication and come back with what I thought of as treat drinks and foods.  She was doing anything she could to get me to eat or drink!  I also understand why she would buy me something fun like a book, coloring book, activity book or some other activity I could do while sick.  For one, she was trying to keep me entertained by anything other than TV.  Two, she felt bad that I was so sick.

Kara has a double ear infection mixed with a cough that occasionally has that seal bark sound.  Thankfully her fever is mild and so far she hasn't thrown up.  The stomach bug was 2 weeks ago.  She will just rest her head on our lap and cry.  We've had such a hard time getting food in her that we're going to start offering Jello (I know, it's not really food.  But it's something!).  I need her to rest and stay inactive so that her body can fight the infections.  I'm also trying to tend to Rowan (who just got 2 vaccines).  Oh yeah, and get ready for Yule, Adam's birthday, and a trip to Wisconsin.  Oh yes, and still maintain the normal routines and needs of the house.  So I'm not able to play with Kara, or read to her, in a way that will keep her resting.  So, evil idiot box time it is.  I have never been so thankful for over 100+ channels, a DVR, DVD and VHS as I have when Kara is sick!  I feel so bad that she's so sick and doesn't get to play with friends (she will miss 2 playdates and 2 days of school this week.  I can't tell which of us is crying over that more).  I want to buy her treats and toys and things to cheer her up.  But dang if this kid doesn't have more than she normally plays with anyway.  So I restrain myself and say that it's my love, my attention and my compassion she needs more than my gifts.

I know part of my feeling bad for her is because she's been sick a lot lately.  She got sick before our trip to Minnesota- stomach bug.  Then she got sick on the way home from Minnesota- stomach bug on the plane.  And now she's sick again.  Oh yeah, that plane trip was very "interesting".  She threw up when we were at the airport, we had no clue she was sick.  Then she kept throwing up on the plane ride home.  And then again a few times at home.  We used all the motion sick bags we could get our hands on.  The flight attendants were very understanding thankfully.  Sadly they were all out of extra bags, thankfully other passengers gave us theirs.

Mom, I understand all you did when I was sick.  I hope that my girls feel as comforted and tended to as I did by you!

Submitted by Heidi-rose Creuzinger, member of NorthMetroDCMommies.  Heidi-rose blogs at Terror at 3 Feet & Rising.
Monday, August 15, 2011

Menu Monday

Photo by: jspatchwork
Cheddar'd Summer Squash

Ingredients:
4 small yellow squash and/or
zucchini trimmed & cut in 1/2
lengthwise.
1/4 cup chopped green onion
nonstick cooking spray
1/8 tsp salt
ground pepper
2oz shredded sharp cheddar
cheese

Cooking Instructions:
1.preheat oven to 400. Arrange squash cut side up in 3 quart baking dish.
2.lightly coat squash with cooking spray. Sprinkle green onion,salt & pepper evenly.
3.top with cheese
4.Bake uncovered for 20 minutes or until squash is just tender and cheese is bubbly.


Submitted to The Mommies Network recipe database by "christy."
Friday, August 12, 2011

Last Chance!

The Mommies Network National Auction closes Saturday, August 13, at 10 p.m. EST! There are but a few hours left to place your bids. With more than 600 items, ranging from boutique clothing to autographed books to tickets to Dollywood, there is sure to be something for every taste and budget.

Click on a link below to see what's what in each category!
Amusement Parks, Activities, and Travel
Beauty 
Books, Music, and Games
Children's Clothing
Classes and Lessons
Crafts, Collectibles, and Toys
Decor and Home Items
Dining
Fashion and Jewelry
Health and Fitness
Infant Items
Infant/Child Gear
Maternity and Breastfeeding
Miscellaneous
Party Time
Photography Packages

By bidding on an item, you are helping mommies all over the country! Twenty-five percent of the proceeds from The Mommies Network National Auction will benefit Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep. The remaining portion of the proceeds will go to furthering our mission:

To provide a safe, secure, FREE place for mothers to find support and encouragement from other mothers and to empower them to be better women, parents, and community leaders.



Back to School the Healthy Way

As the beginning of school fast approaches, we are faced with another year of lunch box choices. Children form their eating habits ealry and it is wise to get them into the habit of packing and eating a healthy lunch.

Most heart disease, obesity, osteoporosis and other life long diseases begin to develop in childhood. Usually, it is a handful of foods that do the most damage and so a handful of changes can go a long way towards a healthy diet.

Let your children help pack their lunch box and offer them healthy choices. Tell them the benefits of their choices. Children truly do like to be educated and it is amazing at how much healthy information they will retain and perhaps even share with others. By offering them choices, they will feel as if they have had a say in their lunch and you will be confident that they will make a wise healthy choice. By adjusting your child's lunch box menu, you can add energy to their day, years to their life, and a healthy attitude about eating in the future.

Remember the following tips and do not forget " A handful of changes goes a long way".
1. Milk should be 1% or fat free. Whole milk is the largest source of saturated fat in a child's diet. Milk keeps hearts healthy and arteries clear.
2. When using cheese, opt for low fat or fat free. Cheese is the 2nd largest source of artery clogging fat.
3. Switch from regular lunch meat to low fat or fat free. Often they taste quite the same!
4. Always offer a fruit choice. Apples, oranges, grapes, bananas, fruit cups or applesauce. Try serving them in a variety of ways to keep it exciting. Also offer yogurt or peanut butter as a dipping sauce.
5. Always offer a vegetable choice. Vegetables reduce your child's chance of heart disease, cancer, stroke and blindness later in life. Offer small carrot sticks, celery, cucumbers. broccoli or small salads. Offer ranch dressing for vegetable dip.
6. Use whole grain bread instead of white bread. The label must indicate that it is "whole wheat".
7. Limit sugary snacks such as sweets, cakes, candy and doughnuts. Most teachers will appreciate this as well.
8. Replace regular potato chips with baked chips, pretzels, nuts, breadsticks or low fat crackers. Also beware of Olean (olestra) products, these can cause cramping and diarrhea. They can also rob your child's body of important cancer fighting carotenoids and phytochemicals. One ounce of Bugles contains as much fat as a McDonalds Quarter Pounder.
9. Use 100% fruit juice, water or flavored water for drinks. Most other juices have only 10% fruit juice and as much sugar as soda.
10. If you use Lunchables, buy the low fat Lunchables. Regular Lunchables get 2/3 of their calories from fat and sugar.

Have a safe and healthy back to school!!!

Originally posted on CharlotteMommies.com
Wednesday, August 10, 2011

How Did I Get Here?

With Nick Jr. blaring in the background, a two year old snoring on her bean bag chair, and a husband snoring on the couch, I am sitting here thinking, " how did I get here?" I was a 25 year old graphic designer for the local newspaper one day, and the next I was pregnant and planning my wedding. Yes, you read that right; my daughter was a surprise baby. She has been the best surprise I have ever had. Since having her, my life has completely changed. I went from living at home with my parents and working full time, to being married to a wonderful man and working as a SAHM.

I can honestly say I wouldn't change a thing. It has been a tough road, but I have learned so much and I've realized how lucky I am to have the mother that I do. My mother has always been my rock and my hero. Growing up, she worked full time as a teacher, yet still made me and my two sisters breakfast each day and drove us to school. She kept our house spotless at all times and cooked us dinner every night. I never really appreciated everything she did for me when I was young. I just thought, well that is what moms are supposed to do.

Now being a mom myself, I look at my mother in a whole new light. I believe she wears an invisible super hero cape. I am amazed and puzzled at how she managed to cook breakfast and dinner for our whole family every day. As a SAHM, I am ashamed to say I barely manage to cook a well rounded dinner three nights out of the week. My mother was always on top of the house cleaning, also. She had a set routine each Saturday - we all had our chores and the house was cleaned top to bottom. My apartment is not clean from top to bottom. I am lucky if it is somewhat clean on most days. I have learned from my mother that things take time. She told me she wasn't always supermom and that it took her years to get into a set routine. As an adult and now a mother, I can look back at my mother and learn so many lessons. I take notes daily and try my best to apply lessons that my mother taught me to my day to day life.

I know I will never be a mirror image of my mother. Honestly, I don't want to be that. I want to be Me - the best mother I can be to my daughter. I feel as mothers we are our worst critics. We criticize ourselves up and down if our lives are not like June Cleaver from Leave It To Beaver. If we are not made up head to toe with the perfect house greeting our husbands with a warm meal and a cold one in our hands at the end of the day, we feel like we've failed. Life is tough and no one is perfect. But I do know that I have a strong, wonderful woman by my side to help me though this journey - My Mom. On top of that, I have a whole network of Moms at my fingertips though The Mommies Network. With both of these tools I am Super Mom.

Originally posted by Kathy from CentralPiedmontMommies.com on The Mommies Network National Blog, 5/7/11
Monday, August 8, 2011

Menu Monday

Double-Bean Burritos

Ingredients:
1 (3 1/2-ounce) bag boil-in-bag brown rice
1 cup chunky bottled salsa
1 (15-ounce) can black beans, rinsed and drained
6 (10-inch) flour tortillas
6 tablespoons bean dip (such as Frito Lay)
3/4 cup (3 ounces) shredded Monterey Jack cheese with jalapeno peppers
1 peeled avocado, cut into 6 slices
12 cilantro sprigs
6 lime wedges (optional)

Cooking Instructions:
Cook rice according to package directions, omitting salt and fat.
While rice cooks, combine salsa and black beans in a small saucepan; cook over medium heat 5 minutes or until thoroughly heated. Stack tortillas; wrap stack in damp paper towels. Microwave at high 25 seconds or until warm.

Spread 1 tablespoon bean dip over each tortilla; top each tortilla with 1/4 cup rice, 1/3 cup black bean mixture, 2 tablespoons cheese, 1 avocado slice, and 2 cilantro sprigs; roll up.

Serving Suggestions:
Serve with your favorite salsa for dipping.
Serve with lime wedges, if desired.

Submitted to The Mommies Network recipe database by "Becky"
Sunday, August 7, 2011

The National Auction has Arrived!

It is said that it takes a village to raise a child, but it also takes a community to support a mother and to provide her with the resources, encouragement, and opportunities necessary for her to be her best. With more than 90 local chapters and a national site that reaches all moms, The Mommies Network provides that community.

We are a non-profit organization whose mission is to provide a safe, secure, FREE place for mothers to find support and encouragement from other mothers and to empower them to be better women, parents, and community leaders. Our philosophy is that no one should have to pay a fee to make a friend, so we offer free membership to any mother within the community who wishes to join. Members gain camaraderie and support through an online forum that is available 24 hours a day, as well as local events where mothers can meet and develop friendships that last a lifetime.


This August, The Mommies Network is hosting our second annual National Auction and will donate 25 percent of the funds raised to Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, a national network of volunteer photographers who "introduce remembrance photography to parents suffering the loss of a baby with the free gift of professional portraiture … [to] serve as an important step in the family's healing process by honoring their child's legacy." The remaining 75 percent of funds raised will be used to further the mission of TMN to provide support to moms across the country.

We believe that by working together, mothers can change the world — one family, one neighborhood, one community at a time. The Mommies Network is a connecting force, helping us each to make a difference in our own lives, in our families, and in the places we call home.
Friday, August 5, 2011

Tooth Fairy Tantrums

"The tooth fairy teaches children that they can sell body parts for money."  David Richerby

There are 3 reasons why I blog:

1. To share or vent things that go on in my life, usually as a mom, but not necessarily confined to that one aspect of who I am

2. To write down memories of those little things that no matter how much I wish to think I will always remember them, I know I wont 3 years down the road, so that I can look back reading these and say "Oh yeah!!! I remember that!!!!"

3. So that many years down the road from now, when my sons are adults and married, and they come to me and tell me they and their wife are expecting their first child, I can gleefully go to Office Max, have all of these blogs printed out, and create a book to give to them at the Baby shower, cackling with glee the entire time. I figure this will be considered good parenting (and great revenge) as I will be letting them know for real what they have gotten themselves into. Muahahaha!

Today's blog is for the latter reason.

Xavier lost another tooth yesterday. It had been loose for awhile, and it finally fell out while at school. He came home grinning madly, showing off the big gaping hole where his tooth used to be, and chattered excitedly about how the tooth fairy was going to come tonight and hand over money for this tiny little baby tooth.

He went to bed, chatting himself to sleep about what he would spend his mighty dollar bill he was going to get from the tooth fairy that night. J casually reminded me after Xavier fell asleep and I nodded that I would remember.

I totally forgot.

Now in my defense, I am flipping exhausted, both physically and mentally! I am dealing with a 6 month old who has decided to start budding his own teeth (not tooth, teeth, I can see 2 tiny baby bottom teeth almost erupting simultaneously) and is waking up every 60-90 minutes at night and just plain ticked off during the day. I am also dealing with a 3 yr old with whom I am locked in a power struggle with over edibles. So yes I was a bad Mom, but I was a Tired Mom. I screwed up. I'm not perfect. But there were reasons behind my lack of memory.

I realized I screwed up at 6 am after nursing Soren for the third time that night when Xavier came out of his room weeping. I asked him what was wrong and he told me his tooth was still there and there was no money. I froze thinking "oh no oh no oh no oh no!!! How the heck can I fix this?!?!?" Then oddly enough I had an idea. Aha! School already called in a 2 hour delay due to inclement weather. You know, cause it was 45 degrees outside and raining. A little bit. Kind of. Well not really by then. But Still!!! So I gathered Xavier in my arms and told him that it was still dark out and there was still time. And that maybe because of the bad weather (by the way honey you have 2 hours off of school! Isn't that great?) that the tooth fairy got blown off course. And maybe, if she didn't make it tonight, she will definitely be here the next night. Because obviously there has to be a good reason!!

I got him calmed down and I thought he seemed ok. I sent him to bed and told him to try and sleep because the tooth fairy would NOT come if he was awake. And then after listening to make sure he did what I asked, I booked it down the stairs and frantically searched for money, a pen, and paper.

I sat down and wrote (in flowing cursive so he couldn't recognize my handwriting) a letter from the tooth fairy explaining she got stuck in snow and by the time she got to our house he was up so she left the money downstairs and would come by the next night to grab the tooth. I then folded the letter into a cool little package that held the money and placed it by on the kitchen counter by the coffee machine. Congratulating myself for a job well done I lumbered back to bed in pure exhaustion, looking forward to just a few hours of uninterrupted sleep as it was now technically Js watch.

At 7 am J bursts into our bedroom with a look of pure panicked frustration on his face and asks me to please help him deal with Xavier because he can not right now or he will do something he may regret. This, coming from my sweet natured, MOST patient, never ruffled, loving husband. If he is like this I know it's going to be a really bad morning. So I throw on my bathrobe and head out to see what is going on.

Apparently, Xavier did not calm down. Instead he started obsessing over the fact the tooth fairy had yet to make an appearance (as far as he knew) and worked himself into a tizzy. Fine. However, he worked himself up so much and got so angry he lashed out. The bad part is he decided to lash out at his innocent younger brother, Ashe, who had been sleeping peacefully in the bottom bunk of their bunk beds...

By pouring a bottle of cold water on him while he slept.

To steal a quote from a friend:

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot!

Seriously???? As I enter the chaos, J had calmed Ashe down for the most part and dried him up but he was still sniffing and trying not to cry. J went over to him to try and make him feel better. Xavier was already in time out and he sat there snarling and growling. I walked over to him and asked him what his deal was, and was it true this was all about the tooth fairy. He growled at me that she never came.

"Oh really?"

"I stayed awake the whole time and she never showed up!"

"Duh kid! I told you point blank she wont show up if you're awake. That was the whole point for you to go back to bed! And before you start your shenanigans again did you notice this note over here on the counter?"

"No!"

"I thought not." I walked over, opened it up, showed him the money, and read him the note. Then, I pocketed the money, told him he lost it for his behavior, and that he would now have to earn it back.

To any neighbors who heard the howl of rage that issued forth from that consequence, my apologies that it happened so early in the morning. I cut him off his howling and told him further more, the way he acted to Ashe, who was completely innocent in all this, was beyond unacceptable, and that he would also spend the entire day thinking of some way to really make it up to his little brother. And if he didn't figure out something appropriate I would.

He flipped out, and I wasn't in the mood to put up with it, so I sent him to his room to calm down. Which took about 45 minutes and a lot of screaming of "I'M CALMED DOWN MOM! MOM!!!!!! LISTEN TO ME!!!! I AM CALM!!! ARRRRRGH!" until he quieted down, actually calmed down, and did some major apologizing to the whole family.

As far as I'm concerned, I'm of the mind to kill off the tooth fairy if this is what is going to happen if she's "late."  And I can promise you she will be late again, at some point, for some kid. We parents who take on the role of a mythological creature are not the Perfect Legend. We're human.

Stupid Tooth Fairy >:P

Originally posted 1/8/10 by Brittany (Rhaven) on TriangleMommies.blogspot.com
Monday, August 1, 2011

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